H E M S

The acronym above is mainly know by members of my family and more specifically by my nieces and nephews.  They have been jokingly instructed to take action if they see me in any of the following situations.

“H” is for hair.  If I ever grow my hair long as I did in the 70’s, they are to just shoot me.

“E” is for escalator.  If they ever see me at the top or bottom of an escalator standing in a position as if I am trying to catch the rhythm of the escalator before I step on, they are to just shoot me.

“M” is for mustache.  If I ever try to grow a pathetic one like I had in the 70’s, they are to just shoot me.

“S” has a double meaning.  If they ever find that I have shit in my pants or I smell like I did, they are to just shoot me.

Besides the four above visual situations, there is one additional request that I have made known to my family.  If at a certain time in my life, I am admitted to a hospital for an extended time period, my main wish is to be on the top floor of that hospital and the window in my room must be able to be opened.

One can figure the rest out on their own.

Author: shutupjohn8

My name is John Burkhart and I reside in Indiana, Pennsylvania. For over 25 years, I worked in Visual Merchandising and Store Design for different companies across America. I have lived and worked in San Diego, Phoenix, Dallas, Atlanta, Tampa, Honolulu, Boston, and Richmond. In 2000, I went home to help my parents. For the back story, go to Youtube, type: John Burkhart on the search line and see a video that Sean Yoder and James Nestor at the Indiana Gazette did over 2 years ago. Be that as it may, in an effort to be/stay productively busy, I was told I should transfer some of my visual and written humor from my apartment walls to a blog. It is all new to me but I hope that you see/read my blog, get a laugh or two and let me know what you think. Looking forward to any and all comments!

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